Author edit: I skip forward quite quickly during this story, partially because we moved so slowly in the beginning that it’s boring to spell out everything.
This story also takes place before “The Player” post
Let’s call him The Musician or “M”. We met during my spring dance show, he was one of the musicians that got added to our dance piece. He was a drummer, and he was extremely cute. He was a senior that was graduating, so he was just finishing up some of his final classes. He was also really sweet and kind to all the dancers that he worked with, which instantly made him more attractive. He was a hard worker and worked random hours in order to help us develop our music.
He and I started texting in way of an platonic conversation. He had asked me about a scheduled rehearsal time, and three hours later, we were still talking. I was thankful that I had an iPhone, because we were sending extremely long texts back and forth. We learned a lot about each other; he had this witty, sarcastic kind of humor that I loved because it made me laugh. It had been a while since someone had challenged me intellectually.
Days passed and a couple weeks later, he invited me to his house to hang out.
It was the first time in college that I had ever been to someone’s house during the night, and they didn’t try anything. And I mean nothing; there were times where we were just laying on his bed watching a movie.And we watched the whole movie!
Fast forwarding another couple weeks, he finally kissed me for the first time. He started to pick me up from my apartment at night and he would drop me back off in the morning.
I began to make friends with his roommates, I had to- I was there pretty frequently. M and I talked all the time, but the dancers from the show and my friends were all left wondering. We got asked all the time if we were dating or talking, if we were lovers or friends.We never answered them, and they all were left scratching their heads in wonder. He started calling me babe and sweetheart every time he talked to me. I couldn’t deny, I loved it. But I didn’t reciprocate it. I didn’t know if I was the only one that he called those names; and I was too nervous to ask.
We started fooling around at his house really one night and it escalated quickly. Before condoms were brought out though, we ended up falling asleep. The following morning, he rolled on top of me, kissed me and asked for a quickie. I smiled and kissed him back, but we didn’t sleep together. I was still a virgin, but I didn’t want to him to know that. Moreover, something was holding me back. I couldn’t explain it, but it just didn’t seem right to sleep with him. So I didn’t.
One night (and I don’t remember how it came up), we had the obligatory “where is this going?” conversation- which normally doesn’t end well. We had said in the beginning that we were going to take things slow and see where we ended up; but after spending so much time together, I was starting to feel a little conflicted. I wanted to move things a long with him, but I didn’t know if he felt the same way. I didn’t want to rush him into anything, but I also didn’t like being kept in the dark.
He told me that he didn’t have time for a girlfriend between work and preparations for graduation, and I agreed. I didn’t want to be in a relationship with a guy who wouldn’t make me a priority in his life. I agreed that we would keep things the same as before.
His graduation came and went- I remember sitting in the hot sun with my friend during the ceremony for about 5 hours, texting him to keep him from wanting to shoot himself in the middle of the quad. He met up with me quickly after the ceremony before going to meet his family for dinner. We talked that night about his plans for after college.
About a week later, I was packing to go back home for the summer. I had a job and my family waiting for me, and I was eager to get back to them. We agreed that we would keep in touch, even though we had a barrier that was the 3 hour time zone change. But I was used to it, I kept in touch with my friends easily- some responses were just sent later. For the first couple weeks, we were ok. We still talked and texted during my lunch break and when he had lulls at work.
Then one Friday, he told me that he was off to Vegas with some friends and would be gone the weekend. I didn’t care really, I just told him to text me when he got there and home so that I knew that he was safe. He didn’t, but I didn’t notice much. But he did text me when he got back to LA. Days later, our conversations got shorter and further apart. Later on that week at work, I was on bored on Facebook and somehow I landed on his page. He had updated his status.
His relationship status. To in a relationship.
Angry tears welled up in my eyes and I had trouble breathing. I quickly closed the page and went to the bathroom, tears threatening to fall in the office. Once in the bathroom, I started running the water on full blast and let a few tears fall.
I was more hurt that he didn’t tell me and he chose to let me find out through a social networking site that I barely looked at. I was angry that he told me that he wasn’t ready for a relationship, but 3 weeks after I left LA, he had a new girl. They had pictures together and a relationship that could have only developed if he had been talking to us at the same time. Which I concluded, he did.
He had lied to me. And probably to her too.
I texted him, and he responded in a way that made me even angrier. He said that he was just having fun and that he knew nothing would have happened between us. The times we had spent together was just his way of being “flirtatious” and “being close to his friend.” Instead of responding, I simply told him that I hope he was happy and closed my phone.
That was the end of the Musician. And I never saw or spoke to him again.